no clue…

i have to let you in on a little secret………

i have no clue what i’m doing!

what a general statement, right?? it encompasses so much in my life right now.  first of all, i’m so new to blogging.  i’m good on computers, but this blogging stuff is no joke! no lies, my friends… i have yelled at my computer screen several times, been a little less than gentle with the keyboard, and profane language {gasp} has left my tongue on more than one occasion…

[okay, more than like ten occasions…who’s counting?] 

i was inspired by a couple blogs that are so seamlessly getting their points across with style and creativity and uniquity… {yeah, i totally just made that word up} …and i have no stinking clue how they have done it!  then i realize that these pioneering ladies that inspire me so much are… wait for it… stay-at-home-moms!**  well, of course, that explains it… they have time to sit and plan their posts… they have time to do crafts and paint and make flowers for their sweaters… and still time to make beautifully balanced meals for their family and tuck their kids into bed with a lullaby… and i admit, i am green with envy! (now if this blogging tool i’m currently using had the color option, that last sentence would have, of course, been the color ‘green’)

i spend 2 hours a day (mon-fri) in a car during rush-hour traffic… the first hour is usually filled with me constantly changing radio stations (because i absolutely HATE talk radio) and fumbling around my car for a paper towel to clean up the coffee that i’ve spilled while trying to avoid an accident (no doubt caused by the ridiculously fast drivers dangerously weaving in and out of traffic) and stuffing my face with a toasted eggo or a breakfast bar… and there are days where 10-20 minutes of my drive are just lost to me… auto-pilot, maybe?? i look around and realize that i’ve already merged onto I-40 from 147. when did that happen?? hello, dangerous. I KNOW! the second hour consists of me playing cases over in my head and thinking about what i have to do the next morning, sitting in traffic because construction is everywhere these days, and my blood pressure rising like a mercury thermometer on a smoltering summer day every time someone decides to ride my bumper.

and the time between the two, consists of me sitting at a desk that has wobbly legs, in front of a computer that only works half of the time… lecturing kids (and parents), writing reports, answering the same question over and over again, talking on the phone with a kid (or parent) in crisis, explaining to my supervisor why a parent wasn’t happy with my decision to send their “innocent” child to court, running up and down the stairs to answer questions in court and process paperwork, and making to-do lists to prioritize the 60 hours-worth of work to be done in 40 hours…

so, i sit here in my bed, at 10:51pm with only 53 minutes left on my laptop battery life… posting a blog.  i should be sleeping, because tomorrow morning will come as soon as my head hits the pillow… yet, i’m posting a blog.  somehow that trumps sleep for the moment… because instead of thinking about all the work i have to do tomorrow, i’m going to make a to-do list of the projects i will accomplish over the next several months.  and i expect you to hold me to all of those projects!  (btw, they are not listed in chronological order)

1) sand and paint kitchen table — decided on finish first: espresso brown with distressing is my first thought
2) purchase and paint 6 dining room chairs — they don’t have to be the same style (so if you see a great deal on dining room chairs… let a sista know!) and remember, i’m a goodwilling, yardsaling, craigslist-lovin, dumpster diver… perfect condition is not needed
3) paint buffet
4) hang curtains in the dining room
5) make cornice boards for the dining room and kitchen — first, save money for the expensive fabric that i’m absolutely in love with
6) get blinds for the kitchen window because the sun is blinding– must be custom measurements because it’s such an odd size — first, save money to pay for ridiculously expensive blinds 
7) finish patio project
8 ) garden — paint/make neat pots for plants
9) paint patio table and chairs because black doesn’t go with my design ideas — and we’re too broke to buy new outdoor furniture (probation officer and cop, remember)
10) sand and paint bench glider for outside — nick’s help is needed on this one
11) sand and paint shelving unit that nick’s grandfather built years ago, and his mother painted black with pink polka dots for her craft room
12) paint top 1/4 of bedroom walls with a lighter shade of the current “bayside” blue — consider painting the tray the same color
13) install crown moulding in bedroom
14) install chair rail in the bathroom
15) new light fixtures for the master and guest bathrooms
16) paint vertical stripes in the master bathroom
17) finally paint the guest bathroom
18) slipcover the terribly picked couch upstairs — idea: learn how to sew to save money
19) organize my art room
20) finish the laundry room mural
21) finish painting for dining room
22) paint funky wallpaper on stair wall
23) sand and paint entry table — tile the top (find the perfect tile first)
24) plan an awesome superhero halloween party
25) make lots of jewelry and find a store/restaurant/site to sell them
26) artSPARK chalk art in the summer — plan awesome design and recruit kristi to help with it again this year
27) finally print all the photos i have of my murals and create a portfolio for future clients

okay, my battery is running down quick and i really need to get to bed… i think that list should keep me going for the next couple of months… i’ll add more to it later!
apologies for the “woe is me” beginning to this blog… sometimes it’s a process i have to go through to get motivated again… weird, i know!

when i was in college, i scoffed at the idea of being a “stay-at-home-mom.”  i was at that stage where i wanted to be independent and i felt it was old-fashioned. now, still not sure about the kid part, but i’d love the opportunity to spend time at home w/ family and do crafts and work on my art and start a business out of my home……

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